Thursday, December 3, 2009

Remembering that Thursday...

As I sleepily try to stay awake to grade more papers on this first Thursday in December I remember THAT first Thursday in December on which we were sure we would be meeting our baby as I was in active labor all. day. long.

Walking, resting, soaking, walking, resting, soaking...

And then pushing, pushing, pushing...

I kept asking "Why haven't we seen the head?"

I blurted out "This is the hardest thing I've ever done."

Eventually the midwives intervened and guided my pushing and I was so grateful... but I didn't want to push anymore. I was too tired, too demoralized, too sure I wasn't going to end up with a baby afterall... but mostly i was too exhausted not having slept for the two nights prior and having pushed for many hours prior... but they all gathered around me and helped hold my legs up and made me keep pushing...

But she didn't come that Thursday.

1 comment:

Mieke said...

lord have mercy!